Saturday, December 6, 2008

Presence Process session 6 & 7

Uhg, what can I say about these sessions?

It was brutal.
This description is going to sound cheesy and new age.
Just bear with me, I have an open mind, but I'm not Shirley McClain or Tom Cruise. 

Session 6 focused on ... finally resolving past issues.

Session 7 focused on feeling secure while dealing with really insecure things.

Sometimes I would remember a mistake I made or something embarrassing that I said or did and I would beat myself up about it.  My reaction was to do what ever I could to sedate the feeling, distract myself, whatever, anything but deal with it.

The session seven tries to trigger even the most deeply buried junk from our emotional history.

This is important because the unresolved issues in our past are the basis for our reflex/reactions in the present.  

The training involves a change of perspective towards yourself.  If a good buddy came to you bummed about something stupid they did in the past would you punch him in the gut and call him names?  I wouldn't, I would try to be a good friend and console the poor dude.  But, why don't I treat myself with the same compassion when I recall a past upset?

Don't judge your pain, 
just listen to it, 
feel it, 
and deal with it.

So here's where it gets weird.  
Each day I would sit in a tub of warm water for 20 minutes.  
My ears were submerged  and everything sounded funny.  
I closed my eyes and remained as still as possible.  
The idea is that in our hyper-culture we are constantly bombarded with sensory stimulus.  
It is hard to experience the peace required to listen.  
So this is a little like sensory deprivation/womb simulation... that's the weird part.  
The difficult part is that what is triggered is not cognitive memory information, but pure emotional memory without any personal historical context.  
It is like taking an emotional shit, a very dull agony.  

But this is what it takes to remove the metaphorical splinter, a deep and infectious splinter that makes your flinch and get angry when people bumped it or tried to address it.
End of metaphor. 

No comments: